Bikini season is fast approaching, and you’re seriously considering a “Mommy Makeover.” Or, you’ve come to the conclusion that you’re done having children, so now you’re dreaming about getting that breast augmentation you’ve been wanting since you gave birth to your first child. Perhaps you’re in your late 30s and your age has finally caught up to you and now you’re planning on getting Botox and dermal fillers.
As you contemplate which cosmetic procedure you want to have done, suddenly, your mind is filled with your children’s possible responses: “What happened to your face Mommy?” or “Why do you look like Barbie in that bikini top?” or “Your face looks like it’s frozen!” or our personal favorite, “That’s not my Mommy.” How do you react to your children’s responses? What do you say?
When You Thought Your Tweaks Were Minor
Often, patients come in to have Botox and dermal fillers, lip augmentation, rhinoplasty, a tummy tuck, or a breast augmentation and to them, the tweaks are minor, and hardly noticeable to the untrained eye, except for the fact that they look “younger” and better than they did before. But, to a young child who looks lovingly upon their mother (or father) every day, the tweaks may stand out from a block away. What’s subtle to a patient, may be major to a young child!
Are you morally obligated to tell your children the truth? When they’re young, you don’t have to tell them the truth, but as they get older, it will be harder to get away with a lie, especially if your child is a teenage girl. Whatever route you decide to take, make sure that you don’t communicate that you hate any part of your body because you don’t want them to lose confidence in their own self-image as they get older.
What advice can we give you? What options do you have? Surely, no one knows your children better than you, so you’ll have to decide how you’re going to handle the situation.
1. You can lie. If your breasts are wrapped in bandages you can say, “Mommy had a booboo, but she’s all better now.” You don’t need to explain breast implants to a three or four-year-old. Or, if you had Botox, you can say, “My magic cream has made my skin look beautiful.”
2. You can take a trip. Let’s say you have an ample chest, but without a bra it’s obvious that you breastfed three children. You want to have a breast lift and augmentation, but you’re not interested in sharing your experience with your children at this point in time. In that case, you can take off for a spa weekend or a short vacation so your children won’t have to watch you go through the recovery process. In clothes, they may not notice the difference anyway.
3. Be honest with them. A lot of patients decide to tell their children the truth, especially when the children are past sixth grade. However, being open about “having work done” does not mean you have to share all of the graphic details – because it can scare them. If you’ll be recovering at home, it’s a good idea to prepare them for what’s to come, such as bandages, bruising, bed rest, and pain. Just don’t forget to reassure them that you’ll be okay and it’s all a part of the recovery process.
We hope this information helps. If you are considering getting a cosmetic procedure done in Oxnard or Westlake Village, we invite you to contact our office so you can schedule a consultation with our board-certified plastic surgeon, Dr. Yuly Gorodisky.